35/1 the downside

arrrrrr......im WEAK......im SMALL!!! i jus feeel soooo WEAK!!!! wa lao i jus went to e gym jus now la.......i feel so so weak la......feel as if my motivation jus temporarily(i hope) disappeared la.......im berating myself la....like i cant seem to lift the weights i used to or rather want to...........mayb its partly e stress from skoolwork but i cant pardon myself!! WEAK!! true i mayb fitter and bigger, i may be doing heavier weights than quite a few ppl in e gym but dats not enuf!! there are still ppl much bigger than me!!!!! N obviously they do much heavier weights......totally disgusted by my WEAKNESS!! i can encourage others n give them motivation to train harder but now it seems

well u shouldnt be reading all dis......whoever u are........well sorry......jus feeling so bad cos of all e upcoming project datelines (again!)......mann its e 2nd day after my break la....i havta go home n do up my assignments due in like 2 days or so la.....its really crap la.....n all e stuff of todae really affected my mood towards myself la......jus feel so helpless, overpowered by too many things to do in sucha short time........aftre all its jus e something from dis world......do grades really matter dat much except for a future? obviously God is more impt la....but how do i show it exactly?? haiz....actually i woke up todae feeling quite good......but i dunno y i was jus affected by all dese stuff...mann....o_O i dun like taking e initiative to do so much....

now all i wanna do is go home n sleep, n hope dat it will be betta with God's help after dat.......rite after i find some charitable organization......mumble mumble mumble.......